It’s not Masters week, but it’s close enough. I’d rather write about Augusta than the Houston Open, so let’s get to it.
@NoLayingUp If you were an amateur who made the field, and knew it would it your only time, would you purposely do something memorable?
— Adam Stanley (@adam_stanley) March 30, 2015
Oh, no doubt. There would be #TourSauce moves sprayed that haven’t even been invented yet. First of all, Ben Crenshaw would be closer to making the cut than me, so I’m going to enjoy my time while I’m at it. I would have a wardrobe change for every hole. I’m going to do log rolls around the greens to try to get the best Villegas-like angle to read my putts. I’m going to be taking selfies on every hole, and will be running to neighboring holes to get pictures with other players. I don’t care if I rack up a delay penalty on every hole, I’m going to make sure this lasts as long as possible. Amateurs will no longer be allowed to play in the Masters, and books will be written about my misconduct over that 36 hour period.
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@NoLayingUp everyone is on the favorites. Give me the two long shots you believe have the best chance to contend at Augusta
— B Daddy Long Strokin (@golfwager69) March 30, 2015
A random sleeper I like is Chris Kirk. A Georgia guy, hits it right to left, and is coming off a nice finish at the Valero, and is way down there on the odds sheet (125/1). But Patrick Reed is going to win this thing.
@NoLayingUp will the pressure of completing the Career Grand Slam ultimately doom Rory's chances at Augusta next week?
— Brice Duke (@DukeBrice) March 30, 2015
It’s easy to pick a guy to NOT win a tournament, but that’s where I stand with Rory right now. He simply has not been able to avoid the big number at Augusta in his career, and he hasn’t been able to do that so far this year in his few starts. He’s also quietly failed to play the par fives well at Augusta, which tells me there’s something about them that doesn’t really fit his eye. I don’t think it’s necessarily the “pressure” that will doom his chances. I just think it’s really hard to win the Masters, and for some reason this course just does not suit him (one career top-10 finish). But again, Patrick Reed is winning this thing.
@NoLayingUp Will Rae's Creek overflow its banks from tears for Crenshaw?
— Mr. Havercamp (@HavercampMr) March 30, 2015
Let’s say Tiger plays, and he and Crenshaw are on the course at the same time on Friday afternoon. There’s a solid chance the broadcast can’t pull it’s cameras away from Tiger blading chips to even show Crenshaw’s last walk up 18 live!
The real question will be whether or not ESPN shows Gentle Ben’s scores as he finishes. He’s played in three events on the Champions Tour this year, and he’s a combined 83 over par. He’s won the Masters, and he’s earned the right to play in this event for as long as he chooses, but even he has to be wondering if he wasn’t better off calling it at last year’s Masters.
Regardless, he will be remembered as being a two-time champion, and not this final Masters. The early line is 1/100 that ESPN shows his tearful celebration at the ’95 Masters as the intro to his final walk up 18.
@NoLayingUp what monument will PReed build for himself at ANGC after he wins next week?
— Will Netterville (@wnetterville) March 30, 2015
He’s going to build a hologram of this directly behind the 18th green:
@NoLayingUp If you got a chance to play Augusta, from the tips, what do you shoot? Who are the other 3 members in your foursome?
— Andrew Blessing (@ABlessing89) March 30, 2015
I’d shoot about 94. I’ve been to Augusta, and I’ve been lucky enough to play a decent amount of championship level courses. I took Whistling Straits back to the 7,800 yards a few years ago, and I was surprised at how the course was still something less than impossible.
However, after walking Augusta, there wasn’t a single hole I looked at and was like, “You know what, I can hit this shot.” The slopes of the course truly can’t be described in enough detail, and the greens have elephants buried under them. I’ve got to be careful wading into Gary McCord’s territory here, but they honestly look like they’ve been glossed with some kind of coating. You’re asking this to a guy who, at this time last year, hit an UPHILL putt into a bunker at Streamsong. I would have a better chance at being asked to babysit Bubba’s kids than I would at stopping a ball on those surfaces.
Because of these slopes, you always had to be very conscious of where to leave your ball on your approaches, and around the greens. But on top of that, the recent renovations have also made it a very demanding course off the tee. I would be asked to move up a set of tees by the 4th hole, and likely escorted off the premises by the turn.
@nolayingup how hard will Reed petition to rename it "Reed Corner" after he torches the field by 12 strokes?
— Kyle Porter (@KylePorterCBS) March 30, 2015
Petition? He’s just going to do it himself (via Adam Sarson).
@NoLayingUp How bad-ass would it be if Tiger just showed up at his tee time on Thursday without giving notice to anyone?
— Ryan (@Front9Back9) March 30, 2015
I can just picture it. Notah Begay walks out onto the first tee, and turns to address the crowd.
“Wait….. do you guys hear that?”
(Patrons look around confused)…. (Mostly curious as to how Notah got on the premises)
“Do you hear that music?”
(Very faint stereo sound coming from the putting green)
“Risin’ up, back on the street
Did my time, took my chances”
(Murmoring among the gallery)
(Music is getting louder)
“Don’t lose your grip on the dreams of the past
You must fight just to keep them ALIIIIIIIVE”
(Notah busts out a megaphone)
“OH MY GOD! THAT’S TIGER WOODS’ MUSIC!!!!”
“It’s the…. EYE OF THE TIGER
IT’S THE THRILL OF THE FIGHT”
Floyd Mayweather walks out carrying the boombox above his head like it’s a championship belt. Bieber is with them. Big Cat is wearing his green jacket. Steiny takes the jacket off him, puts his mouthpiece in for him, and sprays him in the face with water. Cat steps up and pull hooks his tee shot 60 yards offline, and the 2015 Masters has officially begun.
@NoLayingUp Would you trade your 100/1 Reed ticket for 25/1 if someone bought the 75 points off you? IE Take a guaranteed payday or gamble?
— Nick Schulte (@nschulte) March 30, 2015
Nope.
@NoLayingUp This year could very likely be Steve St